Thursday, 13 August 2009

the heart of life.

i climbed onto your bed and sat next to you, staring up at the ceiling- we just wanted to break right through it. everyone else sat around the bedside; some worrying, some thinking about dinner, some trying their best to keep to small talk. we were in our own world, me and you-- silly jokes were involved in our little bubble. you were about to have the scariest thing of your little life done to you, but you were just a kid, you were just a kid and you didn't need to be thinking about where the nurses were taking you.

and i heard snow patrol on the radio that night singing "if i lay here, if i just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world?"

i remember laying beside your bed, waiting for the surgeons to come back and tell us something. i had my headphones in and was laying down by the window, i'd thrown my glasses to the side so i could lay down comfortably. i was in my own little world.

and i remember john mayer singing "i hate to see you cry, lying there in that position."

i remember turning around to face the room, i'm not sure if i was in a daze or just in need of my glasses, but there was this hazy outline of men in blue standing in the room, addressing your mum and dad. i grabbed the headphones off my head and jumped up. they said something about it going really well and achieving everything they wanted to achieve.

i remember everything. not because it's depressing, but because you were more of a man at 10 years old, then any man has ever been since. and now you're the greatest 13 year old in the world.

show me a garden that's bursting into life.

all that i am,
all that i ever was,
is here in your perfect eyes
they're all i can see.


  1. The last paragraph made me smile.

    That Snow Patrol song has always made me emotional, since the very first time I heard it.

  2. I like the way you bring music into your posts, it adds another dimension of emotion :)